Life has a funny way of moving on with or without you. Summer is rushing quickly by, kids are growing up, moving out and on, and my age meter seems to be spinning more quickly.
A few weeks back was a milestone birthday, the big 50. In September, I will gain a new role and title, that makes me feel old- "Grandpa." And while I am fighting getting older, and feeling a bit of depression surrounding it all, my wife seems to be getting more excited. As we talked a few weeks back she talked about embracing the changes and the future. Instead I was talking about fighting the changes and the future. Is seems absurd to me that I would try to pretend I am not getting older, but I do. Denial seems to be a great way of dealing with this issue for me, but it leads me only to more frustration. Since my conversation with Darla, I have been trying to "choose," to embrace the inevitable changes. Rather than dread the name Grandpa (or G-Daddy as I would prefer), I want to start getting excited about taking my G-Girl to Disneyland, and out on G-Daddy and G-Girl dates. Seeing life through my kids eyes was one of the funnest things I have experienced, and I get to do it all over again. 50 isn't so bad either, its the new- well its 50, no matter how I spin it. I am continuing to grow, learn and change. What is not to be excited about. My skills are being used in ways I enjoy, I have a job that suits me, and the respect of those I train and develop.
The aches and pains that last a little longer after a day of staining the deck, or my inability to stay up all night and function the next day, I can't deny. But, they don't have to stop me. Looks like it is time for me to embrace the future and enjoy the process. Just so hard to shake the memory that I considered my my and dad old when they were 36. To all my 50 year old high school friends, here's to an even better 50 more.
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